jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind


Weird Ramblings From A Warped Mind … 6-20-2016

~ My debit card was repeatedly declined at Wal*Mart today. I was trying to buy vegetables so the bank just assumed the card was stolen.

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~ I’m pretty sexy as long as you don’t look at me directly … or in my direction at all.

~ “Pierogi” is Polish for “extremely disappointing hot pocket.”

~ I’ll never forget my Grandfathers dying words to me … “Are you still holding the ladder?”

~ Sometimes I can’t tell if my Hickville Holler (Pop 2) TrailerHood neighbor’s son is a lot like him … or if he’s a lot like a 4 year old.

~ Rage might be a tad dramatic, but I will certainly admit to being “road flustered.”

~ Interesting people live interesting lives … so now you know why I’m bored a lot.

~ “Open Mike Night” sounded like a lot of fun until I realized it was being hosted by the county coroner.

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~ Ever talk to someone so stupid you can hear the misspelled words in their voice?

~ “I wonder why I can’t lose weight?” I say with goldfish crumbs on my shirt and gummy bears stuck in my teeth.

~ Your success has a lot to do with the kind of partner you choose. This statement answers many of the questions in OWN’s (‘Ol Weird Nancy’s) life.

~ I have childlike innocence … by which I mean I’m easily distracted and always sticky.

~ I’ve never been to jail, but I did get stuck in a pair of skinny jeans at a Forever21 last week.

~ If at first you don’t succeed, we have a lot in common.

~ My Hickville Holler (Pop 2) TrailerHood neighbor’s Will stipulates he be cremated and his ashes added to the vegetable water sprayers at the local Wal*Mart. He will be mist.

~ OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy) once gave me the silent treatment for thirteen whole seconds before yelling at me.

~ I wish I could be as happy about anything as our cat is about an empty box.

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~ Nothing says, “I’m broke” like filling out the survey on the receipt for my lunch from Taco Bell.

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