~ My debit card was repeatedly declined at Wal*Mart today. I was trying to buy vegetables so the bank just assumed the card was stolen.
~ I’m pretty sexy as long as you don’t look at me directly … or in my direction at all.
~ “Pierogi” is Polish for “extremely disappointing hot pocket.”
~ I’ll never forget my Grandfathers dying words to me … “Are you still holding the ladder?”
~ Sometimes I can’t tell if my Hickville Holler (Pop 2) TrailerHood neighbor’s son is a lot like him … or if he’s a lot like a 4 year old.
~ Rage might be a tad dramatic, but I will certainly admit to being “road flustered.”
~ Interesting people live interesting lives … so now you know why I’m bored a lot.
~ “Open Mike Night” sounded like a lot of fun until I realized it was being hosted by the county coroner.
~ Ever talk to someone so stupid you can hear the misspelled words in their voice?
~ “I wonder why I can’t lose weight?” I say with goldfish crumbs on my shirt and gummy bears stuck in my teeth.
~ Your success has a lot to do with the kind of partner you choose. This statement answers many of the questions in OWN’s (‘Ol Weird Nancy’s) life.
~ I have childlike innocence … by which I mean I’m easily distracted and always sticky.
~ I’ve never been to jail, but I did get stuck in a pair of skinny jeans at a Forever21 last week.
~ If at first you don’t succeed, we have a lot in common.
~ My Hickville Holler (Pop 2) TrailerHood neighbor’s Will stipulates he be cremated and his ashes added to the vegetable water sprayers at the local Wal*Mart. He will be mist.
~ OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy) once gave me the silent treatment for thirteen whole seconds before yelling at me.
~ I wish I could be as happy about anything as our cat is about an empty box.
~ Nothing says, “I’m broke” like filling out the survey on the receipt for my lunch from Taco Bell.
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