jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

Stop and Give Thanks

How often do you stop and realize how lucky you are? I don’t mean after a tragedy on TV or something major like that. I mean just in general. Every day… run of the mill… things. Do you realize it on a regular basis?

I do every day. Not a day of the week goes by that I don’t realize just how lucky I am and I stop and give thanks. And again… I’m not talking the MAJOR stuff. Obviously, I’m thankful for my Salvation, my family, all the BIG things, but I’m also thankful for other stuff.

Hold on to your hats here cause THIS revelation might just shock you: I am an idiot. I know… I know… you never saw THAT one coming. But every day, I stop and give thanks that I’m not an ever BIGGER idiot.

And luckily, I don’t have to go far. All I have to do is just read the headlines in the news to realize that there are some idiots bigger than me out there. WAY bigger. I know you may find that hard to believe, but just trust me o this one.

For example:

Man upset over gas pump drives SUV through window Yeah, I’m not a big fan of gas pumps either. Especially the prices they charge. But I’m not going to drive my car through the window because of it.

Man with 21 knives arrested after calling police At what point do you think he realized 21 was the magic number? Let’s see here… I’ve got 17 knives. Nope, that ain’t enough. I’ll add a couple more. 19… still not quite right. Let me try a few more. 21… yep, that’s the ticket. Now… what’s the number for 9-1-1?

Judge admonished after attorney paid with coupons That buy one/get one free just don’t get it. Here’s you Get Out of Jail Free coupon. And I threw in a Get one DUI and the second one is FREE.

Cops: Thieves swipe Twinkies, leave tracks in snow I wonder if they would have done better with Ding Dongs? But really… how tough is it to realize they are going to FOLLOW YOUR TRACKS IN THE SNOW, STUPID???

Man accused of stealing coins at mall fountain See… our elected officials just don’t realize how bad the economy really is. I can just hear the cashier thanking this guy for paying $168.92 for groceries in nickels, dimes, and quarters.

Man tries to buy crack with credit card And the sad part is, this crack dealer will now get a credit card machine so he doesn’t miss out on a sale the next time.

Sledder, 62, hurt when improvised rocket blows up After seeing this headline I thought sure the guy was from down south. Then I got to thinking, a southerner wouldn’t know too much about a rocket (not that THIS guy did either), but a southern story would have probably involved fireworks or dynamite instead.

So every day, I read these and I stop and give thanks. I may be an idiot, but I’m not a big enough idiot to make the headlines.

At least not yet…