jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

Nitnoid Things Bug Me

I went to get some ice water from our SUPER-DELUXE Model. Now, the cup is just great under the water dispenser, but the ICE dispenser is just a smidgen too low for my cup. So I have to tip it at an angle to get the ice in. Why do they do that? I really wanted to know. Why couldn’t they make them the same height so that my cup would fit under BOTH sides? How tough is that? Do I need to come down there and show them? Nitnoid things like this bug me.

Soooo… I e-mailed and asked. And I was actually nice about it. I explained my dilemma… my cup fit just perfectly under the water dispenser, but I had to tip it at an angle on the ice side. But only a smidgen. And I waited. Patiently. Because that is how I am. I am an extremely patient person.

So after I had waited what I felt was a sufficient amount of time, I sent a second e-mail. I explained, again, about my water cup… perfect on the water side, but just a smidgen too tall for the ice side. I shouldn’t have to tip it. And I calmly mentioned that this was my SECOND inquiry on this matter. And I waited. Calmly. Because I am a calm and patient kinda guy. But you already know that.

So I sent ANOTHER. HELLO… ANYBODY HOME AT FRIDGE.COM?? And I waited some more. Until finally… FINALLY… I said “ENOUGH!!” They have had MORE than enough time to respond to not one… not TWO… but THREE separate requests.

So I called ‘em. Yep… I got the phone and dialed ‘em up. 1-800-4FRIDGE. And I got Louise. And she answered on the 32nd ring (yeah I know… I pay attention to details). I told Louise I wanted to speak to the person in charge. And she told me to “Go ahead.”

And so I asked Louise just how long I should have to wait to get a response for my inquiries. I explained the problem with the ice side of my dispenser being just a smidgen too short. But not wanting to sound nit-picky, I explained that the water side was fine. It was just a poorly designed feature on an otherwise FABULOUS product.

Louise tried to explain they were always prompt in answering customer’s inquires. At that point I interrupted to explain they had OBVIOUSLY dropped the ball this time. I had sent THREE separate e-mails and, as yet, none had been answered.

Louise sounded genuinely floored that none of my three separate inquiries had been answered. She would get to the bottom of it at that VERY moment.

I was placed on hold and listed to some nice, very calming phone music (AC/DC’s Highway to Hell) while she was gone. And quite promptly she was back.

“Mr. Gilmore,” she said, “I’ve tracked down all three of your inquiries. I see that all three were sent between 1:07pm and 1:19pm today. Is that right, Mr. Gilmore?”

I assured her it was VERY correct.

“Well, sir, I have contacted the design, engineering, research, and PR departments while you enjoyed our phone music. Each department was shocked, no sir, STUNNED is a better word. They were stunned that no other consumer has contacted us about this very obvious flaw in our product which, by the way, has only been on the market in the exact SAME form for over 20 years.”

(Wow… I was impressed with myself that little ‘ol ME had found this flaw. They were STUNNED. That was pretty cool).

“And Mr. Gilmore, to thank you for your tenacity in contacting us, we will immediately get a fix out to you TODAY! The design, engineering, research, and PR departments will work non-stop to ensure this problem is corrected immediately. And they have assured me the fix will be idiot-proof… I mean, consumer friendly. And you should receive it tomorrow via FedEx. We here at appreciate loyal customers such as yourself.”

So how about that? I fought Goliath and WON! I found a defect, pointed it out, they agreed, thanked me… no, they APPRECIATED me as a loyal customer. I was touched.

And sure enough… the next day, the FedEx truck stopped out front. He got out, brought a package with a return address of And inside was the fix. You bet your bippee. They sent me a NEW cup. But THIS cup was just a smidgen shorter.

Yep… nitnoid things bug me.