jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

I Just LOVE Craigslist

I know most of you are busy. Family… jobs… life… etc. That’s why you have me. I’m here to help you see some of the stuff you might miss in your busy life. And being the warped person that I am, I don’t have to look very far or very long.

I came across this one on Craigslist:

Need Help With A Duck
Date: 2011-04-08, 8:17PM EDT

I am looking for someone who can relocate a duck – that’s the short story

I have a pool and every year a mallard and a hen show up and occupy my pool until I open it. This may sound dumb….. but I am serious. I have always had an assortment of methods to chase them away – and easily, bottle rockets, etc… radio, teenagers. Eventually they end up somewhere else – just not my pool. This year the hen showed up without the mallard. She won’t leave and I’m pretty sure it’s the same one that has been here every year.

She won’t leave, and I’m too nice to just go and be mean.

Well, I feel completely stupid, if someone knows how to extract a duck, well, I’m all ears.

Oh and YES I do get laughed at, at the office…..

Is there an online dating service for ducks?

Hey I’ve heard them all.

Lemme know….

Thanks for looking.. and stop laughing – I am serious 🙂

**************** UPDATE ******************

Thank you Craigslist people who have sent me a link to


I probably misrepresented the hen as well… in heat or something….. (SORRY HEN)

Well, of course it took about 2 minutes to find a greenhead and they are a happy couple.
Now… I’m changing gears.

I’m having a fundraiser so that they can get a room… and do what they are doing now… just not in my pool.

If you STILL want to relocate the ducks, they need a honeymoon suite… somewhere else.

Glad someone (something) is making the best of this warm evening

THIS IS NOT A JOKE !!!!!!!!!

************* LAST UPDATE ******************

WOW… this went way out of hand.

NO I WILL NOT MAKE A PORN DUCK SITE!!!!!!!!!!! You Craigslist >>>&^&&^%&% … people scare me…. read a book or something.

And that’s MY take!