jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

How Much is TOO Much?

Trace Adkins (the country singer) had a popular song a while back that said there were certain things you couldn’t have too much of… you can’t have too much money… you can’t have a girl that’s too pretty… you can’t be too lucky… you can’t have too much fun… you get the idea. But after coming across a couple of interesting items this week, I now know without a doubt that some people can have TOO much to drink.

Cases in point:

Police in Brooksville, PA arrested a guy recently and charged him public drunkenness. What gave him away? I’m glad you asked. Maybe it was the fact that he was attempting to resuscitate a long-dead opossum along a highway. One witness reported they saw him gesturing as though he were conducting a séance. Another saw him attempting to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.

Now… stop and think here. How much alcohol would you have to consume to make you think it’s a good idea to give mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to a dead opossum? I’m quite sure I would be passed out or dead from alcohol poisoning before that thought ever entered my mind.

Now to me, there are a NUMBER of bad parts about this. One… the poor guy got caught. You know he will never live this down. I know if one of my friends gets caught trying to revive a dead opossum, they will NEVER forget it. And two… he was unsuccessful. The opossum is still dead as of this writing.

The second item I came across has two interesting points. One… there is a drunk driver involved. Two… there is a concerned citizen that calls 9-1-1 about the drunk driver. Now… the interesting part is… there is only ONE person involved.

Read on.

Police in East Lansing, MI released a copy of the 9-1-1 call where the drunk driver called and reported herself. She chatted with the dispatcher for 20 minutes as he assisted officers with finding the inebriated driver.

In the first moments of the call, the dispatcher asks: “Are you intoxicated?” and the woman replies: “Absolutely.” The dispatcher pleads with the woman to pull over and she tells him she “shouldn’t be driving.”

It’s great to see the public get involved when they witness someone breaking the law. It is all too common for John Q. Public to turn a blind eye because they don’t want to get involved. I commend this drunk driver for taking the time to assist the law enforcement officers in getting a dangerous situation off the roads. Maybe after her trial, where she faces up to 90 days in jail, she can get a Citizens Award for Community Involvement.

Yep… as long as there are crazy folks, I’ll have something to ramble about.
And that’s MY take.