jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

Bulk Is Better

I like Sam’s. And Costco. I am a firm believer that if 10 rolls of toilet paper are good, 200 has to be better. I can always find a use for a 5 gallon bucket of ketchup. And no house is complete without 25 bottles of Tabasco sauce. And my freezer ain’t full unless I have 25 pounds of fish sticks. Yep… I believe in bulk.

And so it came to pass recently as I was sitting around contemplating, that I happened upon an idea. Why should I bother with a quart bottle of something when I could pop down the road and get a barrel that holds 53 gallons? That’s roughly 212 bottles. Now THAT seemed like a good idea.

So off I went.

Immediately upon entering the door, the bargains began. I NEED 200 grapefruits. No… REALLY!! I bet I could eat that in a couple of days. And apples. I LOVE apples. And they have six varieties in 25 pound bags. One of each? Why I don’t mind if I do.

And that’s how it went. A box of this…. two bags of that. Oh… and how thoughtful. They were serving lunch while I shopped. How nice. Although the portions were VERY small and I didn’t like how they had the buffet spread out along several different aisles. Those server ladies seemed to get tired of me going back four and five times.

Anyway… back to the task at hand. A 5 gallon bucket of peanut butter. Hmmm… better get two. This must be a touch of Heaven. Where else could you get a 10 pound bag of chips?

Hot dogs… 50 to a pack. And forget a COUPLE of steaks. I bought a COW. The WHOLE COW neatly packed into 125 packages of steaks, chops, roasts, lips, tails, and hooves!! It’s hard to find fresh cow lips, too. I hope there is room in the freezer.

So after checkout, I was faced with the monumental problem of packing it into the car. I’m glad OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy) has such a knack for packing. She must be a packer in a parallel world or something.

I could go on, but I have 5 gallons of ketchup to use. Shouldn’t take long.

And that’s MY take!