jester journals

Weird Ramblings from a Warped Mind

Weird Ramblings From A Warped Mind… 3-14-2016

OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy) gave me a “Do Not Resuscitate” T-shirt for my birthday. Just in case.

~ I’m the reason some Taco Bells have ATMs.


~ I’m uncomfortable with being called a “genius” and so far, no one has made me feel uncomfortable.

~ They say to dress for the job you want, but I tell ya, I’ve been dressing as the Pope for years and it’s gotten me nowhere.


~ If you’re insulting a kid, make sure you don’t say bad things about her mama when she’s standing right behind you and she’s OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy).

~ I nailed a picture of a lost tree to my Hickville Holler (Pop 2) TrailerHood neighbor’s cat and now they hate me.

~ I have a lot going on, most of which is purely in my head. But that doesn’t make it any less distracting.

~ When they tell you to smile and say cheese, don’t do it. There’s never any cheese. It’s all lies.

~ Our cat thinks that she owns the house and we just visit her at night.

~ I can’t wait till everyone changes their profile pics for hemorrhoid awareness week.


~ I can always tell how my day is going to go based on which belt loop I can reach.

~ The scariest trick OWN (‘Ol Weird Nancy) pulls is offering me a choice.

~ If you gaze deeply into my eyes… you’ll probably notice my “check engine” light is on.

~ Sometimes I like to imagine what it would be like if giraffes walked around speaking Chinese to each other. Other times I take medication.

~ I had a dream where my refrigerator just walked to my bedroom, opened the door, stood there and stared at me for five minutes, then it closed the door and left.

~ I never say anything bad about my former boss, but I type a good bit of it.

~ According to Ancestry dot com, it looks like I’m the least successful family member in roughly 300 years.


~ I’m learning braille. So far all I know is Floor 7.